Giant Beach Ball
Everyone loves the beach, but you’ve struggled to find acceptance at the beach ever since you were a pimply, weedy teen. Girls just giggled and walked past, and the boys laughed and pointed at your slender physique and spotty face. The spots have faded since then, but you haven’t put on much weight, so trips to the beach still seem fraught with anxiety, and you have been searching for ways to make an impression, seem interesting and fun, and lose the ‘loser’ profile you seem to be stuck with! A Giant Beach Ball is always a sure-fire hit with the ladies; after all, what could be more hilarious and fun than a beach ball, and the best way to make something even funnier is to make it giant-er!!
Just inflate the Giant Beach Ball, then go bounding along the beach with it, bouncing it along the surf, over the elderly sunbathers, and find some cute kids and puppies to play with. Girls love kids and puppies, right? Hang out with the kids and puppies, bouncing your 10 foot beach ball with them, and bribing them with ice cream and hot dogs to hang out with you and your oversized ball, while you do your best impression of Boyfriend Material. Pretty soon some girls will come along, and then you can try talking to them! You’re all alone on that one however, buddy, so perhaps find some fun things to say and Sharpie them on your hand so you don’t forget.
Just be careful where you aim the bouncing of your giant inflatable plastic sphere, however. Not everyone appreciates a face full of plastic, and the last thing you want is to be buried up to your neck in sand again because of a careless bounce in the direction of those Volleyball-playing jocks. Accidentally crushing someone’s child into the sand with the giant volleyball is not ok either, so be sensible when it comes to choosing the size of the children you play with. Ages 7 to 9 are still cute enough to appeal to girls, while being sturdy enough to hold their own against your Giant Beach Ball.
However you choose to bounce it, this Giant Beach Ball is sure to bring you the beach side hilarity and resulting popularity with the ladies that you have always dreamed of. Just make sure you leave some ladies for the rest of us, haha! Note: Giant Beach Ball does not guarantee or promise you a girlfriend or happy relationship in any way. Giant Beach Ball holds no responsibility for any Beach Ball related injury or property damage caused by bouncing Giant Beach Ball along the beach. Please do not use if any wind or breeze is present.